Skip to main content

THE INTRODUCTORY IDIOTS GUIDE TO RECOGNISING A FRESHER

1. Once a fresher looses any of their property, they put up posters requesting any good Samaritan who came across(or along it depending on which way you were walking),to hand it to them. The are yet to realize that once you loose anything on campus, no one, and I mean no one, ever sees it.
2. You are sited comfortably browsing in the library, and someone comes and tells you that they have borrowed the book they are carrying and they want you to record it. Damn, that is definitely a fresher.
3. Again you are surfing in the library at around midday, then you neighbor, who is pressed since he has been surfing since 8.00 am, decides to go to the loo (Which are always been cleaned or out of water ).Someone then comes along and posts themselves in your neighbors seat and start using their computer. After explaining to them the computer is private and not library property, the person agrees to leave, but insists that they want to press the “exit” button first to exit from what they were doing. You will not get any marks for identifying this as a fresher.
4. You are in Baghdad, the favorite self service mabati kiosk in KM, and someone comes sits down and proceeds to whitsle, in an attempt to call the man in charge of collecting dishes. When he happily comes along, the someone gives their order of “ugali ya mtama na supu ya ngamia” to be served on their table. Another fresher.
5. Anyone coming from KM carrying a new “Solex” padlock (made in USA china) is definitely a fresher. They are yet to realize that they do not the keys that come with the padlock, since the top from a normal Bic biro will act as a hustl-free-key.
6. Anyone posing in the library to stare at the large blue plastic sign that says what should be on the firsts floor, is (Well, I don’t have to type it, do i?)

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Beers in Kenya: A sober opinion

Note: This is a dated post and has since been mostly passed by events. SAB Miller beers including Castle and Peroni are no longer widely available in Kenya after their exist. Sirville Brewery was bought out by Brew Bistro before being permanently shut in a tax dispute. Kenya is a land of milk, honey, beaches and taxes. I have penned, or is typed, a newer post here .  Peroni - One of the best beers in Kenya. Did a taste of canned and bottled Italian, and bottled Tanzanian I like the tangy flavour and body in Tanzanian Peroni. The can is close. Heineken drinkers will like the Italian one.  I have had a short beer swigging stint in my life. It has however been long enough for me to share my opinion of Kenyan beer. Interestingly, over the course of sharing such opinions with other drunkards connoisseurs,  I have found that we all have different views as to what beer is the best, which one makes you too drunk, or which one gives one free, extra hangover for every ha...

How to Drive from Kenya to Namibia (or South Africa)

  What You Need COMESA Yellow Sticker (Tanzania and Zambia third party insurance. Botswana may require local bond. Namibia doesn’t require insurance) Logbook Processing with KRA Copies of your logbook for temporary import permits in other countries Passport Yellow fever vaccination proof. COVID vaccination proof may be required Warning triangles and 1 litre fire extinguisher

Nairobi's Top 4 Texas Brisket Places Reviewed and Ranked

Brisket on a bed of roast vegetables with barbecue sauce at Texas Brisket, Kikuyu  This review has been updated after a number of you suggested I try the brisket at County2County.  What's the best place to have Brisket in Nairobi? What's even brisket?  Brisket is one of the toughest cuts in a cow, from around the belly. It is so tough that it has to be smoked for about 16 hours to tenderise. But that there, is the catch.  12 to 16 hours later, it is the most flavourful and softest cut you will ever have. So full of flavour and so soft you can pick it apart with your fingers.  However, due to the long cooking time involved, only a few places offer brisket in Nairobi.  The best so far is Texas Brisket which is located within Kikuyu Railway station.  They do the meat for a proper 16 hours, and will usually have a fatty or non-fatty portion. The fatty portions are more tasty. A 500 gram serving goes for KSh. 900 and a 1 KG order comes with a serving of fre...

Visiting Watamu

Getting to Watamu: Flight to Malindi Airport. Jambojet flies here and so do other airlines from Wilson. You'll then need a Cab to Watamu (KSh. 1,700 to KSh. 2,000 - many apps are inaccurate) or matatu just outside the airport (KSh. 100) SGR to Mombasa, then shuttle to Watamu. There are about 2 regular shuttles and they charge KSh. 1,500 to KSh. 2,000 one way  Bus to Watamu. Tahmeed and other buses operate regular schedules to Total Watamu  Drive: It's faster branching through Mariakani to Kaloleni then to Kilifi. The route through Tsavo is not any faster and has park fees. Takes 9 hours  Things to do  Beach Sunbathing : Watamu has some of the world's best beaches, with white sand. The left side from Watamu Village has a bay with shallow water during low tide,  you can wade and swim in the ocean even if you don't know how to swim! Ocean is warm in July - August but very windy. Watamu beaches have lots of seaweed but this shouldn't deter yo...

Beers of Kenya. The Ultimate 2019 Guide

Four years ago, precisely in 2015, I wrote about beer in Kenya in what has gone on to be my most popular post this year with more than 5,000 people reading it. It seems that there is a lot of interest in exploring beer in Kenya, which is understandable. The brewing sector has grown since then and we now have lots of options, which means it is time for another review. Back in 2015, Kenya had one major brewer - EABL/KBL, challenged by Keroche and Sierra which is more of a small volume craft brewer, and arguably Kenya’s first craft brewery. It had also been joined by Brew Bistro which mostly sells its malted stuff at its outlets in Nairobi and later by Sirville, a bar located at Galleria Mall. Sirville was later sold to Brew Bistro and converted to the latter for a while, before shutting down in what is alleged to be a tax dispute.