Skip to main content

Orange River Cellars Wines - Kenya's New Sweet and Dry Wines

There's a new panty remover wine brand in town.


It's from down in South Africa. In some of our geography classes, they taught of the Orange River down in South Africa. If you remember of such a lesson, it might have touched on the VanDerKloof dam on the river, or it's source from the Drakensberg mountains. I'm not sure though, whether they mentioned of the agriculture of the region, which apparently might contribute to your weekend activities.

There have been a host of South African wines, ranging from the boxed Namaquas (Namaqua is a place in South Africa, now you know) to the Mara's (yeah, it's a South African wine) to African's Five Chenin Blanc, which is among my favourite in Kenya.

Making its way into the market is the Orange River Cellars brand of wines. The group has a range of wines including boxed reds, boxed whites and probably the only boxed rose (pronounced rosay for wines) wine I have seen in this market.

Executives from the firm tell me that they also supply wine to other brands, who mostly sell wine, but do not grow the grapes required to produce the same. The grapes are grown in South Africa under surface irrigation, where water is tapped from the Orange River under gravity, without use of machines.

Orange River Cellars consists of 890 grape growers, on 4,500 hectares running 350 kilometres on both banks of the Orange River in South Africa's Nothern Cape Province. They have been growing wine since 1968.

In addition to their boxed wines, which are quite sweet, and which the executives tell me will get you drunk. They also warn that the good wines, might influence you or your friends to undress. Under such circumstances, those partaking the wine should not panic (if you know what I mean) - after all, the Bible has similar reports of wine leading to various states of undress.


Grapevines along the Orange River in South Africa


Orange River Cellars Chenin Blanc 

Other than the sweet box wines (I have never understood why people, and especially ladies love sweet wines - they are sickening sweet!), Orange River Cellars has a range of other wines including dry reds, and my favourite, dry white. This includes the Orange River Chenin Blanc.  I have not had the opportunity to try Orange River Cellar's other wines, but I did try the Chenin Blanc.

Under garments under the influence? 
For the non-French speaking, like me, Blanc is French for white. Chenin is a wine producing region in France, whose grape characteristics can see them produce a wide range of wines from neutral wines to sweet and acidic wines.

The grapes from Chenin in France are also widely grown elsewhere in the world, especially in South Africa. Chenin Blanc is a dry white wine, meaning that it is neither that acidic or sweet. Orange River Cellars' Chenin Blanc has a slight hint of acidity, but is otherwise a dry, great tasting wine.

Another great thing about the Chenin Blancs is that they get you high - come on, let's admit it, we all drink to be drunk, or tipsy, at some point. A bottle of Orange River Cellars' Chenin Blanc will get two of you drunk (hint, hint), or get you drunk on two sittings.

My sample of Chenin Blanc. 
It also comes with a screw cap, eliminating the danger of cork screw stabbing you as you open your umpteenth bottle. Best of all, you don't need a cork screw, just in case you visit her with a bottle, and she can't find the cork screw.

Other Orange River Cellar wines include Colombard, Chardonnay, Viognier, Nouvelle, Shiraz, Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Petit Verdot, Malbec, Tannat, Muscat d’Alexandrie, Red and White Muscadel.
Orange River Cellars wines are available in a number of outlets in Eastlands and also at Chandarana Supermarkets at the moment. If you have tried any of Orange River Cellars products, do share with us your experiences in the comments below.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A Kenyan in Addis Ababa (Part 3) - Going Out

Merkato - "Africa's largest 'open air' market?  This post continues from Part 1 and Part 2 For shopping, Merkato is a much better option compared to Churchill Avenue. Addis residents call it the biggest open air market in Africa. Contrastingly, a more fitting description would be a collection of malls, a much larger version of Eastleigh, but a less congested and cleaner one. The malls each have stalls which deal in a variety of items,  from paintings and other artefacts, to leather goods,  to imported hardware from China. Some of those missing from Mengistu's reign of red terror. Image taken at the Red Terror museum If looking to shop for textiles,  then Shromeda is where you should be headed to. Buying textiles around the Central Business District might see you paying as much as 10 times what they cost. Note the distinction between various textiles - there’s handmade scarves and machine woven ones, same to fabrics. There’s also pure cotton fab

Why Humanity Hasn't Learned From the Covid Pandemic

In 2020, the Covid-19 pandemic began ravaging the world, succeeding the 1918 flu pandemic.  Many found it unbelievable that despite all the scientific progress that the world has made since 1918, from composite jets to modern healthcare to going to the moon, the world was still susceptible to a pandemic.  Ironically, some of these advancements largely played a role in the spread of the pandemic. Thousands of global flights every hour and air conditioning fanned its spread like a dry wind would in a forest fire.  There was even further disbelief in mid-2020 when it became apparent that many countries were even struggling to keep a pandemic in check. Developed countries, supposed to have the best healthcare, suffered the worst outbreaks amidst disagreements on measures such as quarantines and wearing of masks.  In yet another twist, technology advancement finally came to our rescue with the speedy development of vaccines, including the safe pioneering of never-tried-before mRNA vaccines

Beers in Kenya: A sober opinion

Note: This is a dated post and has since been mostly passed by events. SAB Miller beers including Castle and Peroni are no longer widely available in Kenya after their exist. Sirville Brewery was bought out by Brew Bistro before being permanently shut in a tax dispute. Kenya is a land of milk, honey, beaches and taxes. I have penned, or is typed, a newer post here .  Peroni - One of the best beers in Kenya. Did a taste of canned and bottled Italian, and bottled Tanzanian I like the tangy flavour and body in Tanzanian Peroni. The can is close. Heineken drinkers will like the Italian one.  I have had a short beer swigging stint in my life. It has however been long enough for me to share my opinion of Kenyan beer. Interestingly, over the course of sharing such opinions with other drunkards connoisseurs,  I have found that we all have different views as to what beer is the best, which one makes you too drunk, or which one gives one free, extra hangover for every hangover you get

Heineken 0.0 Best Alcohol Free Beer

What if you wanted to drink a beer, but without getting drunk? Say, you don’t drink alcohol, or for one reason or another, you are off alcohol. Or perhaps it’s a working day, and you would like to have a cold one in the middle of the day but without all negative effects. Well, you could. Welcome to the world of Alcohol-free beer.  Over the last few days, I’ve been enjoying some Heineken 0.0 rather than the typical beers. Now, Heineken 0.0 is a beer, in the malt lager style as the standard Heineken, the only difference being that all the alcohol has been removed - it contains less than 0.03% alcohol, which counts as safe enough even for those who are pregnant or affected by alcohol, according to Heineken. It smells very close to a Heineken, tastes close to a Heineken, and you even keep taking a piss like you would when drinking a Heineken - but you never get drunk.  How do they remove all the alcohol? From my research, they brew a standard Heineken beer as normal, then use some form

How to Make Your Own Sparkling Water

Buying your own kit means you need to carbonate it in a fridge or freezer since Carbon Dioxide best dissolves at temperatures around zero.  I have been making my own sparkling water for about a month now.  It started with a love for carbonated water, but being appalled by the price - about KSh. 80 per 700 ml recyclable glass bottle. Sparkling water is sold as a premium drink.  This got me researching into what it really takes to make your own sparkling water.