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Unemployable Rioting University Students

Something is very wrong. Some bored students caused massive traffic snarl ups on Wednesday, the second time in as many weeks. They blocked major roads and highways within Nairobi, coupled with our impatient driving and flawed traffic control system, they brought everything to a standstill. You see, I can tell you this because it took me one and a half hours to cover the less than 500 metres between Kencom Building and Holy Family Minor Basilica, before I gave up on the journey to Yaya.

Many residents were angry, they could not move around. Furthermore, some were robbed and had their property damaged by either the same students or vagabonds who took advantage of the situation to rob them. they were visibly agitated as they swore on Twitter to never employ students from the University of Nairobi, now things were more wrong.

The employers had gotten the silver bullet to sort out the mess of our future engineers in the University going on the rampage every week, denying them employment. I guess this is supposed to be a lesson to the thousands of students in our public universities to have good behaviour.

The employers claim that there are better ways for students to demonstrate than rioting against a murder of their colleague or the disappearance of the another. I agree.

Something is wrong: people getting murdered every day and others disappearing is normal. It does not get mentioned in the news unless the police were involved and the affected family is adamant,  unless the victim is the son or the relative of a prominent employer or unless the were a public university student who spawned rioting.

On a normal day, employers are treated to news of politicians abusing each others mothers and other important things that politicians say from day to day.

On certain occasions, some employers happen to be hijacked on their way home to watch news, especially if they happen to own a second hand Toyota which might have been earlier stoned by rioting unemployable engineers. At times, the hijackings go wrong and  the employers are no longer in a state to employ as they are badly injured, several fatally injured, rendering them incapable of employing.

Luckily for most of us, the story of hijacked employees will be tucked in the inside of newspapers and better yet, unemployable engineering students will not riot to protest the death of yet another employer.

Where are the police in all this occasions?  A big number of them have been permanently seconded to guard politicians from themselves. At Several times, politicians go overboard  and hire some unemployable thugs to kill their opponents. Other times, they rally their gullible tribesmen to attack the tribe of another politician who abused their mother. Either way, police need to keep the politicians safe as the gullible tribesmen slaughter each other, like they did in Rwanda in 1994 and in Kenya in 2008.

The remaining policemen are then deployed to stand along the route that the president will take on his way to officiate some event, while the rest will be deployed along our roads and highways where they will keep them clear when our leaders politicians need to use them. For the rest of the time, they will be burdened by the traffic that results from badly managed junctions where busier roads have lower priority due to the reason that they carry long distance trucks and tax paying ordinary Kenyans rather than busy politicians.  The remaining police officers will then be left to guard the rest of the country, poorly equipped and paid. In an effort to make efforts meet, they will result to bribing just like those along our highways.

In the next elections, politicians who abuse each other mothers , others involved in honest recreational drug trade and others who do not consider employment an honest way to make a living will be voted in by both semi-educated Kenyans and unemployable engineers from their tribes.

In the universities, bright and bored students will fight out for the limited spaces. Those who are lucky enough to make it will then wait for 2 years to join ISO Certified universities for 4 , 5 or 6 year courses where they will spend half the time in more holidays.

They will also get to meet professors who might not have a clue in what they are lecturing  who might make passing of exams difficult. Furthermore, they will discover ISO certified processes might take more than twice the length of a normal process, and that ISO certified processes have the ability to audit exams they passed four years ago and turn them into failed exams. In the process, some of them might try breaking in to clubs and get killed by overzealous guards , while others will simply disappear into thin air when crossing tunnels along the most busy Highway in East Africa. The rest will become unemployable after a section of them fail to distinguish rioting from demonstrations, despite the Egyptians having demonstrated this.

Employers might have to brace themselves for further demonstrations by student engineers who will in their droves block roads engineered by Chinese technology that the students and their professors might have no clue about. Furthermore employers should brace for occasional total breakdown and anarchy where the majority of unemployed youth go on a looting spree as they try to reduce competitors from other tribes for the limited jobs with the urging of their tribal leaders politicians.

Employers are advised to mitigate their risks by rewarding students in universities that did not riot by employing a few of them and paying them salaries a fraction of their monthly university fee.

Something is wrong.

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