Skip to main content

Improving my Facebook Experience

I am a very ardent time waster. I also happen to be very lazy and kiddish. My laziness is proven by the fact that my waking up time is the same as that you are required at your job, for those who work. My kiddishness is proved by the fact that I actually loved, yeah loved, that Disney kids movie called "Enchanted".

Recently, I decided that I got a lot of time in my hands, and decided to shop for an adult toy.Before many of you get the wrong ideas, my search did not even take me off my seat. A few e-mails and mouse clicks later, I was a registered facebook member. I really have not seen such a good time wasting tool for millions of people world wide than facebook.

Facebook is a really great time waster.In fact, here are some reasons why facebook is a great time waster:
• I get to play games such as vampires and werewolves with people that I last saw in class 3, and who I did not even use to play with them back then.
• I get a chance to tell strangers and my friends of my proud accomplishments such as how I much I drank over the weekend, that I can not remember. whether I lost my virginity or not. I even tell them of how I have vukad to A Wonderful World permanently, while I have even no idea where my Zain sim card is.
• I get a chance to upload photos of the weekend (above) that i really got drunk showing me peeing in the middle of a well lit road.
• I also get a platform to tell the world of my new found love, and how complex we love each other that we end in a complex relationship, so complex like those formulas for simple sulphuric acid reacting with an Organic compound.
• Normally, I feel that the messages that I send my complex lover are not enough for it(Doesn't this replace having to us him/her?) to read in private. Therefore, I send him messages via the status updates, so that he feels where my status stands on our complex love.
• I get to make many English speaking friends, and then learn a foreign language(Spanish, French or German would do) and then update my status in this foreign languages. Since that already have enough time to waste on facebook, they also have enough time to use online translators to translate them.
• By the way I am a very good fan of Britney Spears, a football team called Lokomotiv Moscow and a vehicle known as the Mahindra. Therefore, I usually use photos of miss Britney, the Lokomotiv Moscow goal keeper or the Mahindra as my profile picture. I then invite people that barely know me or strangers to be my friends. Of course my status picture will be very helpful in helping them identify me. Don' you think so?



I can go on and on about how Improve my Facebook |Experience and that of my friends, but Supper time has cometh. Check my status to know what I am having for supper...

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Kenyan Beers and Craft Beer Reviews for 2025

It's 2025, and you asked for yet another Kenyan beer review. Let's cut straight to the chase - we keep the many stories for once we are drunk. Right? This year we categorize the beers according to breweries.  Bila Shaka / Bateleur  Flagship is Bila Shaka which is a rich flavoured but bitter IPA with 6% volume.  They focus more on quality and experimenting.  Home to many pleasantly (sweet per 2 people. I agree) favoured beers like Dire Straits, and for the ladies who love it a lot on the sweeter side, there's Honey Badger. These come in at about 5% or so. Jua Kali isn't as sweet as the above and is a mixed rice and barley beer, for some reason popular in the hot coast. Capitan is their bar beer and is a light-ish, pleasant beer at 4% volume and a good time passer when you're there for a long and good night and have things to do the next day. My favourite local brewer and highly recommended, especially Dire Straits. It's a medium beer, don...
Post a Comment
Read more

Nairobi's Top 4 Texas Brisket Places Reviewed and Ranked

Brisket on a bed of roast vegetables with barbecue sauce at Texas Brisket, Kikuyu  This review has been updated after a number of you suggested I try the brisket at County2County.  What's the best place to have Brisket in Nairobi? What's even brisket?  Brisket is one of the toughest cuts in a cow, from around the belly. It is so tough that it has to be smoked for about 16 hours to tenderise. But that there, is the catch.  12 to 16 hours later, it is the most flavourful and softest cut you will ever have. So full of flavour and so soft you can pick it apart with your fingers.  However, due to the long cooking time involved, only a few places offer brisket in Nairobi.  The best so far is Texas Brisket which is located within Kikuyu Railway station.  They do the meat for a proper 16 hours, and will usually have a fatty or non-fatty portion. The fatty portions are more tasty. A 500 gram serving goes for KSh. 900 and a 1 KG order comes with a serving of fre...
Post a Comment
Read more

RE: Appointment as Ambassador of the Republic of Kenya to The United States of America

Image: South African marriage courtesy The Telegraph ( http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/southafrica/6237922/South-African-man-marries-4-women-at-same-ceremony.html  ) Dennis Kioko, Address Pending. President to-be-elect, Republic of Kenya, Address Pending, Again. Dear Sirs/Madams, RE: Appointment as Ambassador of the Republic of Kenya to The United States of America  I would like to draw your attention to news reported across various sections of the press (way behind your daily portraits on the front page) that several Missions to the country are equivalently vacant with the duty of appointed high commissioners having expired. This includes Kenya's High Commission to the United States of America. Among your first duties, having assumed duty as Kenya's president, duly elected or otherwise, will be to appoint commissioners to these missions. It is in this regard that I highly ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Eastleigh, the Shopping District of Nairobi

It reached a point where I was getting envious, envious of the Nairobi beggars , the ones who are disabled, mostly amputees. I was not envious of their begging, but more of their begging while dressed in pretty cool garments, more so designer jeans. You see, you cannot beg in designer jeans and expect people to listen to your plight when they are dressed in garments that are almost wearing thin. So after been approached by several beggars who I felt were better dressed than I was, I decided that it was time to upgrade my wardrobe. The first place to look was my dirt-cheap stockist in downtown Nairobi, but I found that when it came to jeans, the stock reminded me of some jeans that I once saw when I was in primary school, popularly known as Savco. Remembering a story I had been told about Eastleigh having a large enough stock of textiles sold at a subsidized price(apparently)by pirates , I decided to pay the place a visit. The place, might be thse source of the billions of dollars ...
2 comments
Read more

The Bible. Why you should read your Bible.

After reading what The Candid Tin man had to say about the Bible on his blog, I felt a disappointed man. In my opinion, the candid Tin man had committed the same errors of omission and commission that have plagued the Bible for centuries. In the beginning, the Roman Catholic church was the dominant church worldwide, and the bible existed in Latin language which common folk like me and you did not understand. Latin was a dead language used by the priests of the roman Catholic church and perhaps a few scholars. The Roman Catholic church aimed at controlling the public's opinion , as the church still does today, and especially their opinion of what was God's word. Therefore, back then, if you needed to understand God's word, you had to consult the Roman Catholic Priests to read the Bible for youa nd then tell you what it said. How well they did this and their intentions remained questionable, with accusations directed at the Roman Catholic Church for mistranslating The Bi...
5 comments
Read more